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Sunday, March 13, 2011

Are You Fooling Yourself?

I'm writing this in response to a blog I saw on a blog called 'Black Girls Are Easy' it's a terrible title for a blog but one of his blog post was very interesting. Now my warning is, it's raunchy and he uses some colorful language but if you get through that you may find some good information on here for black women. It's called Are You Wifey or Are You Pu$$y?, yea it's provocative but I figure that's because the young man wanted to get attention and he does. Now personally, I think this article could be written from a woman's perspective about a man, many people are having issues mating/dating people. Also many people are doing dumb things when they mate and date. The essence of this blog post talks about women trying to use sex to get a man to marry them and the fact that most men are more than willing to take the sex women give and never give them anything significant in return. I know the truth of that hurts but this is a young man and this pretty much what most men think, no man is willing to turn a woman into a wife if all she has to offer is sex, no matter how good the sex is, you have to come with more. I think it's a lesson well worth learning for black women. Black women as a set of women are have the highest rate of new HIV cases among all women in the U.S. 56%. We also have a out of wedlock birthrate of 73%, you can read more about that and the possible outcome of this issue on No Wedding, No Womb website. As black women we are also marrying at lower rates, only 46% and are the last choice when it comes to the dating pool. Now some of this you can certainly blame on people skewering the image of black women including other black women. But some of this is because black women are making bad choices, maybe we need to do some self-introspection and figure out why we've become so easy and willing to take up the role as 'pu$$y' for men and think that's good enough to catch a man. I don't think black women are dumb, I think we're extremely smart, we've just decided to turn off our brains in this situation. I'm thinking that some black women have become so desperate from lack, they're willing to okey-doke themselves into believing what's between your legs is all that's required to make a man fall in love. Or the worst of all delusions that love=sex, please take that out of your mindset if you're thinking it. I'll say it again because it bear repeating especially for black women, when we make better choices, we get better results.


  1. So true. Sad but true!

  2. Hmm, for young black women, I'd say wait until you get married, The men around your neighborhood clearly don't value you so don't give them anything until you got something on your finger ;)

    I know it's not for everyone but thats my advice.

    Oh and open you options to include all men so you CAN get married lol.

  3. Well, I'm a bit of realist and the unfortunate part is that some young bw or old bw is not going to keep her pants up because I say so or think so. So here's the alternative, know what you're getting into. Know what he thinks of you before you take them down, I don't personally believe in preaching just abstinence I think it's irresponsible b/c everyone is not me. But if you know that when you decide to sex some dude down thinking it's going to make him want to marry you and hear from the horse's mouth that no it's not and he's going to talk about like you're dumb behind your back. Maybe your critical thinking skills will comes into play and you'll pull your dang panties up and wait for someone more worthy or even better figure out it takes more than a vay jay jay to pull a man, any man worth anything. Critical thinking helps people make better decisions. I don't want to issue edicts, I want young bw to think, that's what they have a brain for.

  4. Yes, thats why I said its not for everyone :)

    But I'm going to teach my daughter to keep her panties up, at least until a respectable age and not for just any guy she meets.

  5. Well, that's a good thing nothing wrong with telling your daughter or son for that matter to wait on quality. I know you're going to give her the critical thinkers brain, so when mama isn't there to tell her what to do she'll be able to figure it out herself. Thumbs up!