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Saturday, January 29, 2011

What does the ‘Type’ of Person Who Would Date Interracially Look Like?

Really, to tell the truth I don't know. I'd like to be able to say after dating interracial for 20 or so years there's a type but there isn't. Now, this is speaking to black women who may be thinking but just aren't sure who the guy is or what he looks like that would date a black woman. Really he has no certain look and for all the non-bm who may be interested in dating black woman, I'm telling you the same thing. As much as people would like for women to believe that the only black women that non-bm are interested in are bohemian, all-natural girls, with short nails, natural hair, and flowing clothes or Halle Berry,  it's a crock. We look like the variety of black women out there, which means how do you tell who's going to be interested in you. I hate to do this to people but you're just going to have to take a chance, for men if you talk to a black woman and she's talking back and being friendly you may have found someone who is interested in dating interracial so use all your guy skills and go for it. If you as black woman find that a nice non-bm is speaking with you, he may be interested, keep chatting him up and do a little flirting, it helps. Because there is no image I can put on here or put into your head that will help your radar go off when a person who may want to date interracial comes along.

I've dated a few white men in my life and I couldn't give you list of any their similarities besides they were all white. They had different beliefs, looks, ways of dressing and style, musical tastes, heights, hair color, it was all so varied. So when I hear people say white men only go for this type of black woman or black women wouldn't date a nerdy white guy just one that looks like  Brad Pitt, of course, I got to call shenanigans on that mess. I find a variety of things attractive about men, they don't have always have the whole long list, some are important, so important that other parts of my 'you're hot' list are diminished because they possess a particularly attractive quality. I'm big on humor and intelligence, really humor and intelligence can make a guy that would be so-so in my eyes the hottest thing walking. This is how important those are, so important to me that it makes me find Seth Rogen when he was in 'Knocked Up' really hot. He's just so cute and funny, I love him. But yes I really love Brad Pitt too and think he's funny and smart, see so it's all over the place and I know for sure that Brad Pitt has dated interracial previously with a black woman, Robin Givens specifically. All people have different tastes, things that turn their head or make them want to possibly get to know someone better, those are so subjective you could ask every person in the world and not get two list that are similar, less known two lists that are alike.

I want folks that are desiring to date interracial to remember, you don't have to change who you are to get the person you desire. Someone wants you and thinks you are attractive just the way you are, now if you feel like you want to do something extra to put your best foot forward, do it. Because really self-confidence is key in drawing people to you, if someone feels you're comfortable with yourself, they'll be comfortable talking to you. I know some black women have issues with self-confidence, so work on those and then be happy when someone else notices it. Also here's a tip, I'll probably be sharing again especially for black women but really for any woman, when a man compliments you do not qualify his compliment. If a man says you have nice legs, do not go into how you wish you could lose some weight because you think your legs are too big. At that point, you've just turned the man off with your lack of self-confidence. Please learn to take compliments graciously and just say thank you. Lesson for today.

I just want to share with one photos I gathered from the internet of interracial couples with black women and white men, just to share the variety that goes into this type of couple. Also want you to know, that these sorts of couples have a specificity, no rhyme or reason, attraction is a funny wonderful thing. So go out there and know the guy or girl you want to date in the interracial love game, unfortunately doesn't come with a secret handshake, sorry. But it's fun, finding out who it may be.

Well it looks like a hodgepodge to me, what do you think? Just go out into the world and find the one you love.


  1. Ah, "certain look" that would weird if you could tell that about person just by looking at them. Unless they are wearing a t-shirt with "I'm down with the white boys" or something like that. Actually that would kinda funny to see.

    Oh and thanks for adding me on your favorites!

    I should make a favorite list as well :D

  2. Yea, unless I got a t-shirt on, really you couldn't just look and know LOL. I have people ask that and I notice people ask that of others in IR quite a bit. Yea it would be great to have a t-shirt that says "I'm Down with the Swirl" but haven't seen one yet but if somebody wants to sell something cool, they can certainly take this idea. I'll be the first to buy one. Nkoszana, if you know someone that does the screen printing of t-shirts it's a million dollar idea or at least a couple of thousand LOL.

    Not a problem, I love good blogs and I love trying to steer people to them. That's they way I find great blogs from other blogs I love recommendations.

  3. I find that whether the couple is IR or not, the couple 8/10 kinda look alike. For instance all of the couples in these pics look like they have alot in common. The couple that has the biker look and the couple with the glasses talking to their son.

  4. Saran, I notice the same thing that's why it's dang near impossible to figure out who is swirling and who is not b/c people are so varied.

  5. Hey Eugenia!

    I don't get the you have to look a certain way in order to date a WM thing. Or BW don't want to date WM who look nerdy. I don't agree with BW contorting themselves to get the attention of any man. Yes, a woman should take care of herself but the main focus of doing so shouldn't to get a man. I really take pride in my appearance and that's because it makes me feel good about myself.

    Just like in the pictures you presented, the WM/BW couples I encounter do tend to be varied in their appearance. I like my hair straight, I'm light-skinned and I'm not thin (or fat). I don't have a problem getting attention from WM or dating them. And I have been interested in WM of all types (e.g. nerdy, hunky, etc).

    Also, when encounter a WM I'm interested in I never assume anything because I know that men like women for the most part, so there is no need for me to try figuring out whether he will be interested me or not because of my race. I just show interest and wait to see what transpires.

  6. Liza207, I personally figure what you just said was the best advice you could give a bw. You never know exactly what is going to attract you or even repel you until you start to get to know the person more. I really like cute guys, but good-looking men are so subjective to me. Like I said I love Seth Rogen and Brad Pitt and could easily see myself interested in either one, it makes no sense but attraction never does. So like you I figure men have the same thing going on, we all have something that will draw us to a person but sometimes that little extra something I don't know, humor, intelligence, compassionate, good table manners, who knows just knocks the ball full force into that person's court. Also if you're lacking those things, a really good looking person can lose major points and be pushed to the side.

  7. you know when i date i really dont care what a person looks like or how mutch money they have what matters to me is what is inside them and i am very quick on the mark reading people i can tell with in a few minutes what a persons personality is like

  8. Well I can't lie, I do care what they look like because physical attraction is kind of thing that gets you through the door but you can't stay on just physical attraction, you have to bring more. Yes it matters that you make money, I don't want to take care a grown man, may not be the same for men but a man of his salt wants to take care of his wife and family. You don't have to be rich but I'm educated and I want him educated. Unfortunately it takes me a little time to get to know people but most people can't hide for long when it comes to who they really are, we can't be fake forever.